It is a well-known fact that little ones throw tantrums as a result of frustration, tiredness, hunger, sleepiness, etc. They tend to throw tantrums by crying, screaming, and acting aggressively, sometimes even in public places. But did you know what managing your own anger and frustrations in front of your kids will influence them and decrease their tantrums? Studies show that children throw tantrums because they do not know how to tackle their temper.
Teaching and influencing kids a certain behaviour can be a huge challenge. Staying calm and composed during certain situations can seem to be quite impossible. Regardless of whether you are responding to an episodic temper outburst or facing your regular day to day frustrations, dealing with and being able to manage your own outrage in a heated situation will make it simpler to influence and train children to act likewise. In order to help your child, subdue his/her anger, attempt to be your kid’s partner where you both are trying to win over the temper that continues to prompt trouble. Meanwhile, kids may fray your patience by talking back, contending, and opposing and it is during these times that you need to express your patience the most and how you handle situations.
Responding to your children's meltdowns with hollering and eruptions of your own will just train them to do likewise. However, staying mentally collected and smoothly managing a baffling circumstance allows you to show — and instruct — proper ways of dealing with outrage and frustrations.
Here are some ways to help kids practice the skill of containing their temper-
Help your kid to communicate through words: Make your little one understands some basic rules such as no screaming or throwing stuff is allowed. Make sure you ask them to cool down first so that you can help them and do not engage and communicate further until they do so. This will make them realise that they must communicate in a calm manner to gain your attention. Then, ask them to talk to you about why they are angry or frustrated. This will teach them to transfer their emotions to words and be able to express them through communication.
Listen to them and respond: this is the part that your child may struggle with - finding words to express what he/she feels. Give them the time to slowly be able to tell you what is wrong and make sure to make them feel like you understand their situation. Further, help them find a solution and talk about the behaviour that they expressed. Tell them that it is okay to feel angry but it is not okay to express it through yelling, hitting, or throwing stuff. Let them know that an apology must be made for such behaviour.
Create ground rules that are to be followed: let your child know that they need to talk to someone if there is an issue because crying, yelling, screaming, hitting, or throwing stuff is not going to help solve the problem. Be clear with explaining these terms and make sure that they understand that that kind of behaviour is not acceptable.